


The Star Spangled Ass

by FireAwayy



Category: Captain America, Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Camping, Heavy Petting, Kissing, M/M, Sketching, Stony - Freeform, sarcastic smart asses, steve is a sex god
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-09
Updated: 2013-04-09
Packaged: 2017-12-07 23:54:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/754563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FireAwayy/pseuds/FireAwayy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony could see through Steve's wicked plans. He knew this 'innocent and american' act was a joke. Steve had a dastardly plan, all right.<br/>Tony did not expect the plan to lead to the two of them going camping.<br/>But don't worry, Tony was absolutely not in love with Steve Rogers, nosireebob. Tony Stark doesn't have feelings, he's Iron Man!<br/>But maybe sometimes...he's just Tony and he might have feelings for Steve Rogers...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Star Spangled Ass

**Author's Note:**

> Written for golden-red-heart's (http://golden-red-heart.tumblr.com/) prompt:"THE AVENGERS GO CAMPING!" 
> 
> So this turned into a Stony fic faster than anything I've ever written. Whoops.  
> First off there is no hardcore smut in this. I wanted something a little gentler and romantic and tentative. Not sure if that came across but there it is. I really liked writing this though and if it brings enough joy I could foresee continuing it or adding to it. What really happened on the Doctor Who weekend with Phlint? It could come later on. 
> 
> Apparently I like making vague Wizard of Oz references and sassy!Clint.

Tony Stark was a genius. Everyone knew of him and his brilliant mind, even crazy ass Russian engineers wanted to be him. But more importantly, Tony Stark was Iron Man, and as Iron Man he was part of the greatest team ever assembled. 

                Tony Stark was an Avenger. 

                Despite outward appearances Tony loved being part of a time—a loner for a considerable part of his life he had no idea what he was missing. But when it came to friends and being part of a team…well Tony had always assumed he was better off without. But when a team, when _friends_ , were thrust upon him he discovered that maybe just once, he was wrong. 

                So it was only natural that he built them all a home to live in. Despite what Bruce said, science bro his ass, he was not _nesting._ Tony just thought it would be easier to have everyone on the team in one convenient location. And if that location happened to be a picturesque, completely custom tower in the middle of the city that he designed…well that was a happy coincidence. 

                Tony had planned on fixing furniture, holes in the wall, bloody noses, and perhaps even some _feelings._ But what he did not anticipate was the Star Spangled Ass. 

                Oh yes. Steve Rogers might be his team leader, and a _seemingly_ good guy but Tony knew the truth. He knew Steve wasn’t as innocent as he let on. No, he was downright dastardly. When Steve rescued a kitten from the sewers everyone had applauded him. Then he had the audacity to bring the kitten home and nurse it to help and give it a good home. Natasha had suggested they name the kitten Bucky in honor of Steve’s fallen friend and the kitten had become the Avenger’s mascot. 

                Bucky always slept in Tonys chair. 

                Tony found that highly suspicious. 

                Steve had grown quiet when she mentioned that and stoically didn’t cry, but did that manly silence and deep contemplation that was basically crying only infused with testosterone. 

                Now, Tony was smart enough to know when he was attracted to someone. And he could fully admit that the Star Spangled Ass…was well…hot. He was so hot he was hawt. But this attraction was nothing really, just a guy appreciating the general hawtness of another guy. No biggie. It’s not like there were feelings attached, no. Tony Stark didn’t do feelings. Especially not feelings for Steve Rogers. 

                But there was nothing he was going to do about this attraction, nope not a damn thing. He didn’t even jerk off to fantasies about Steve curled up around him and holding him close. No, no. Tony had self control thank you very much. 

                Tony was also a pathological liar. 

                But no one outside of Jarvis knew Tony’s current jerking off fantasies and Jarvis practically worshipped Tony so he wouldn’t say anything. Jarvis denies this but Tony’s a genius so he knows these things. 

                Attraction is one thing but love and feelings and all those pointless time wasting things was something completely different. It’s not like Tony liked the way Steve’s hair glinted in the morning sun as he happily chewed on his oatmeal and cinnamon with orange juice or the way he nibbled his cheek as he sketched on the window seat in the main room of Stark tower. Sometimes Steve even had the audacity to bring food and drinks down to Tony when he was working in his lab, the jerk. Then he hung around and talked about music and politics and other things and before Tony even realized what was happening he _was talking to the Star Spangled Ass about his feelings._ And that was the crux of Steve Roger’s dastardly plan. 

                Tony was enjoying the musical genius that is AC/DC while working on his newest prototype. He wasn’t willing to reveal too much about this particular design but let’s just say that Hawkeye was going to have a lot more fun shooting things down with what he was working on. 

                The Hawk appeared as if conjured, leaping lithely onto the work table and crossing his legs. Clint had this childlike quality that somehow disguised his dangerous assassin tendencies—it was probably why he was so good at his job. And while Clint joked and laughed, sassing his way through the tough decisions and situations Natasha was an exact contrast. She never smiled, except that one time where she broke a guy’s neck with her thighs and wasn’t that smile just a little terrifying. But it’s why they worked together so well and Tony was absolutely not jealous of their camaraderie.

                “Whatcha doing?” Clint asked through a smirk picking up a wrench and glancing down the handle. 

                “Important genius stuff. Why aren’t you crawling around the rafters?” 

                Clint stilled and his smirk faltered a little. “You’re little robot in the air ducts joke was ha-ha-larious. I really enjoyed it, especially when they started shooting thumbtacks.” He reached behind him and pulled out a smashed up head, dumping it on the table. “I enjoyed destroying it beyond recognition.” 

                Tony gaped. “My baby.” 

                Clint’s smirk was back and he was playing with the wrench again. “Oh, btw Cap wants us up in the living room ASAP. Has some sort of Captain-y announcement to make.” 

                Tony raised an eyebrow at him. “So what he says jump and we jump?”

                Clint wiggled his fingers at Tony’s face. “Fly my pretties, fly.” He said in an impersonation of the Wicked Witch of the West. 

                Tony frowned and felt his eye twitch. “You’re scary good at that.” 

                The younger man grinned and threw him a salute. “You gonna say no to apple pies and America? C’mon.” and Tony followed him _not_ because he was interested in what Captain America had to say but because he needed to keep an eye on Clint before he destroyed more of his tech. 

                “I’m kind of hoping he’s wearing the Cap pants.” Clint said with a grin. “Have you seen his ass in that. Yum.” 

                “I don’t think Phil would approve of that kind of talk, Hawkeye.” 

                Clint grinned when his long time boyfriends name was brought up. “Nah he wouldn’t but I’m a young man full of love and horny as fuck. Mostly horny.” Clint laughed. “I would never betray Phil, mostly because I’m terrified of that thing he does with a bendy straw, but I can appreciate the Cap candy. Can’t you?” 

                   “Pass.” Tony said irritably. Tony could _very much_ appreciate the Cap candy, and he did so often and very subtly. Something snapped in him when he heard Clint mention it. If he was an average man and not Tony Stark he would say it was jealousy but he was Tony Stark so fuck you very much. 

                Clint eyed him suspiciously and continued up into the elevator. 

                “You know that I’m not Hawkeye, right? That I’m Clint who sometimes dresses up as Hawkeye to fight crime.” 

                Tony punched the elevator button and glanced at Clint. “Stop being philosophical it doesn’t suit you.” 

                The younger man rolled his eyes and flipped Tony the bird. “What I’m saying is that you don’t always have to be Iron Man. You’re allowed to be Tony sometimes.” 

                There was a moment of shared glaring between two hostile guys on high protein diets. 

                “What are you saying, Barton?” 

                “Whoa, whoa. Set phasers to stun, dude. I’m just saying that you can cut loose and enjoy another’s company sometimes. Find a significant other and enjoy your life Tony, life isn’t always about flash and bang. The quiet stuff can be nice too. Like Phil…he’s a scary dude and I’m pretty sure he could kill me before I even got my bow out, but he can also be an awesome pillow for Doctor Who marathons and makes great pancakes for shitty days.” Tony stared at him and tried to process the image of Phil Coulson watching Doctor Who with Clint Barton draped over him. They were wearing fuzzy bunny slippers and onesies. 

                “Honestly, Phil makes the world worth saving.” Clint clapped a heavy calloused hand on Tony’s shoulder and squeezed a little. 

                The elevator doors pinged open and the two men drifted apart and stepped away from each other and into the living room. The living room had been designed with an open floor plan (mostly for Thor who tended to break things). The giant Stark Tech TV took up an entire wall and opposite it sat a giant brown leather couch shaped in a semi circle. The coffee and end tables were made of brushed steel (Thor was hard on tables). The kitchen was behind the couch, made so that someone cooking could also watch TV. It was big and impressive and Wolfgang Puck had publically begged to use it. Steve and Natasha were the only ones who cooked, Bruce sometimes made tea and humus, Tony heated up frozen pizzas and drank obscene quantities of coffee, Clint sometimes took pity on Thor (who was banned from the kitchen after the Poptart/Toaster Strudel incident) and made him the pastries he’s so obsessed with. 

                Clint made some awful fangirl squealing noise and leapt over the couch, snuggling into Natasha. She raised an eyebrow but otherwise made no move to push him off. Thor was busy playing with Tony’s old Rubik’s cube at the end of the couch while Bruce was tapping on his Stark Pad. Steve paced in front of the dark TV looking up and smiling at Tony. 

                His hair was brushed and neat and the loose grey shirt and khakis he wore couldn’t disguise the finely toned muscles that rippled as he walked. His broad shoulders tapered down to a slim waist and muscled legs that Tony had studied enough to know backwards and forwards despite the loose fabric. Steve’s smile was infectious, soft and not huge but dazzling all the same. 

                “Last night I had an idea.” Steve said as Tony finally stopped ogling him and took a seat beside Bruce. 

                “We should go camping!” 

 

 

                “I hate you.” Tony muttered as he crammed himself inside the small Jeep Steve had borrowed from S.H.I.E.L.D. 

                Despite Tony’s protests, and the lack of enthusiasm surrounding the trip Tony was still awake at dawn, in a jeep, with Steve Rogers on the way to some God awful mountain in whothefuckcares, New York. Steve had insisted on a vacation and Tony’s suggestion of Maui, or anywhere besides a tent on the ground, landed on deaf ears. 

                And where were his so called team mates?

                Clint claimed the Phil was home for the weekend from his super secret mission that nobody even bothered to ask about because they knew he wouldn’t tell them and Fury had given him _three whole days_ off. Clint said they planned on watching every Stargate: Atlantis episode and not leaving their quarters. Bruce just laughed and walked out of the room muttering something about his entire life spent camping and avoiding people, Thor wanted to try this ‘Midgardian traditional vacation’ but he had obligations in Asgard, and Natasha said if she wanted to rough it with a bunch of smelly guys she would have stayed in Russia. 

                But what had Tony said when Steve turned that earnest, innocent, billion watt pure American smile on him? 

                “Sounds like fun.” 

                But Tony was now regretting that decision, regretting his inability to look away from those dazzling blue eyes—and seriously questioning this whole attraction thing. 

                When Steve had shown up at his door, travel mug of coffee in hand and a simple backpack thrown over his shoulder Tony had to fight the urge to drop trou and give Steve everything he had. Hell, at that moment looking at Steve’s sleepy smiling face Tony would have ripped out his arc reactor and given it to Steve for Christmas if he had but asked. 

                That wasn’t simple attraction right? Tony was slipping…he probably had cancer and that’s why he was acting this way. He could be dying and the last thing he would ever do on Earth was go camping. 

                Why wasn’t he more upset? 

                Steve sung along to the radio quietly as he drove down the roads. He refused Tony’s GPS saying he knew the way already, and kept quiet as they drove. Not a forced silence but companionable. 

                Tony chose not to reflect on his feelings during this time. 

                Before Tony knew what he was doing he was asking Steve questions about things he liked and missed from the 40’s. It was an innocent tactic to keep from thinking about feel…cancerous thoughts. Not feelings. Cancer. 

                But his plan back fired (even geniuses get it wrong sometimes, don’t rub it in) and he found himself leaning towards Steve’s body warmth and laughing with him, pointing out interesting things on the side of the road and making asshole comments that just made Steve roll his eyes and grin. Tony found he liked the grin and made it a game to make that grin appear as many times as possible in one mile. 

                Before he knew it they had pulled into a small parking lot off a highway and Steve had stepped out of the Jeep. Tony followed and shrugged on his backpack that Jarvis had packed for him. Tony hoped that everything he needed to spend two and a half days in the wild were in this little bag…but if not he was camping with a super soldier. Not that Tony needed reminding of Steve’s presence. 

                They started hiking up a softly sloping hill. The trees leaned over the trail and seemed to block out all sound from the nearby highway. Both men were in good shape and they shared a similar pace as the hiked up the mountain. They alternated between sharing their thoughts on the trail and on nature in general and lapsing into a thoughtful silence only to be broken when Steve saw something he thought was interesting or Tony tripped because he was staring at the pure joy on Steve’s face. 

                The small cleared space, sorry the ‘campsite’, was next to a small stream and bordered by a small 30 foot drop that had a gorgeous view of some young saplings and a rock formation a few miles away. It was a pretty spot and Tony could see why Steve wanted to come here. Tony was afraid to ask why Steve had chosen this spot, it seemed like a deeply person memory that Tony didn’t want to sully with pointless questions. 

                Somehow Steve had fit a tent into his small green backpack and he had it set up in no time while Tony was mentally planning a self sustaining tent that would set up itself. Or no wait! A robot that was specially made for camping! It could do things like make a fire and roast smores and other nature shit. 

                While Tony shoved his backpack into the tent Steve sat down on a rock and pulled out his sketch book from God knows where, Tony sure hadn’t seen it. He was looking out over the drop off and Tony watched the back of his head dip and turn as he followed the lines on his paper. 

                Jarvis had packed one book for Tony, the slim paperback edition of Jaws that was one of Tony’s favorites. He pulled it out and sat down next to Steve and began reading. Hours flew past like this, comfortable silence draped over the two men. Tony thought maybe he understood what Clint had been trying to tell him in the elevator. Maybe. 

                Once the light grew too dim to draw or read Steve went out and collected firewood. Tony hadn’t even thought of that. He couldn’t help his city boy instincts. After starting a particularly spectacular fire Steve shed his shirt and hiking shorts and began washing up in the stream. 

                Tony wasn’t watching. 

                Really. He was too busy sliding a hand over to Steve’s notebook and pulling it towards him. What if Steve epically sucked at drawing? Would Tony be less attracted to him? Was Steve being an artist that much of a turn on?

                Turns out Tony didn’t have to worry because Steve was a damn good artist. Damn good. There were sketches of Clint shooting his bow, the lines sharp and depicting his lean muscular stature, the intense ball shriveling gaze of Natasha and a moment between Thor and Bruce where they were laughing and clutching their stomachs. Tony greedily searched through the rest of the pages until he saw himself depicted. There were at least 20 drawings of him doing various things: working on his bots, suiting up in both the Iron Man suit and the monkey suit he wore for press conferences, one of just his hands and the final one…the one that took Tony’s breath away. 

                The final sketch was of Tony sleeping on the living room couch. His feet were sitting up on the arm rest and one arm was thrown over his belly. Tony’s shirt had been pushed up and the taut lines of his abdomen and the bottom of his arc reactor could be seen. The drawing had so much more detail and love in it than the others that Tony found his eyes tearing up. 

                “I was going to show you.” Steve said as he padded up to Tony in bare feet. He was still damp from his impromptu bath and the firelight flickered off his bare skin, deepening the muscular dips and curves of his body. He towered over Tony like this, standing while Tony sat curled over Steve’s sketchbook. 

                “Why didn’t you?” Tony croaked out. 

                “I was afraid of how you would react. Thought you might think I was…messed up.” 

                Tony stood and set aside the sketchbook, looking up at Steve and invading his personal space. “Why would I think that?” 

                Steve chuckled painfully and rubbed the back of his neck. “Because I obsessively watch you all day then spend the night drawing every facet of you I can remember.” 

                Tony’s arc reactor had to have temporarily malfunctioned and sent that shot of electricity that made his knees go weak—only possible explanation. But standing was becoming difficult so he decided to lean on Steve because Steve was strong. Immediately Steve’s arms circled around Tony and pulled him closer to his damp chest. Steve was firm but not hard, soft but also strong and comforting. Tony found himself melting into him and then there was a light brush of a kiss against his lips…tentative and questioning.

                Tony decided to silence and doubt and smothered himself against Steve. For the first time he felt truly open as Steve opened his mouth in shock and Tony licked into that beautiful smile. Tony realized that he may have been a little too preoccupied with saving the world and that maybe he sort of thought Steve was the bee’s knees. 

                Tony’s hands slid past those gorgeous shoulders and down his back, cupping over that firm ass and oh hello, Star Spangled Ass indeed. 

                Steve groaned into it and pulled Tony up and into the tent, laying them both out on their sides and lazily kissing and groping everything he could get his hands on. 

                Tony’s dick decided to do it’s tree trunk impression, but Tony could feel Steve’s doing the same so everyone was on the same page. 

                “No more guessing and ah…ah…drawing from memory.” Tony gasped out as Steve sucked a line of kisses down his neck. When did Steve get so good at that? And with who? Wait…was that jealousy? 

                Tony must be dying. 

                Steve backed off and looked deep into Tony’s eyes. “I…I suck at these things. At least I think I do…but I’ve never tried. But I want to try with you Steve, I have real…um…” Tony trailed off. 

                Steve smiled softly and raised an eyebrow. “Feelings?” 

                “Yes…uh those things for you and I don’t want them to go away so can we try this whole thing. Dating or whatever. Or just lots of groping and petting because that’s cool too.” 

                Steve silenced him with more kisses until they drifted to sleep, Steve pulling Tony closer to him and surrounding him with his super soldier warmth and strength. 

                Clint was absolutely right. 

                Tonight Tony was just Tony. Not Anthony Stark and not Iron Man. 

                Tonight Tony was here with the person he might sort of possibly, not out of the question have feelings for…and he was just going to let himself be Tony. 

                Tony wasn’t sure when he fell in love with Steve (yes god dammit he was in love okay, geniuses fall in love all the time get off his back) but it felt pretty good. Maybe staying on the couch and watching Doctor Who all day could be something pretty damn exciting, even with the bunny slippers, so long as he could be draped across Steve. 

                Tony would even consider wearing a onesie. 

 

 

 

End.    


End file.
